Monday, July 18, 2005


Back from penang over the weekend, was actually on MC last Friday but had to work for the first half of the day. Thanks jeremy for forcing yourself out of bed to fetch me to take my bus, appreciate it lots brother.
I came back, de-stressed and afreshed, im amazed of how things have changed. And Im not referring to the outward surroundings of Penang but 'me'. U know? I was this girl who just wanted to be away from home as much as I could growing up and almost 6 years ago, if you asked me...I wouldn't wanna go back to Penang. That was when I first 'settled down' in KL, I was glad the government sent me away from home. But sometimes its funny where life takes you, or in my case, where God takes me in life's journey that has shaped and changed certain perspectives, views, priorities and even my personality. Talked about growing up eh...or growing old-er?! Yikes!

Let me take you to a sneak peek of my journey, I used to be rather ashamed of my family, the house I lived in, the fact that I had to take the trishaw to school, that I had such a complicated home and hot tempered dad who was rather infamous in the neighbourhood, that I used to cry a lot by myself, that I had bruises at times etc etc a nutshell, i love to go to school cos I disliked to be home. Surprisingly, I was a good student who needn't study much and had great friends, didnt end up doing drugs or play truant or turned into this wild rebellious teenager. But I always envied most of my friends who are rich, had great parents who will turn up for sports day etc and came to school to pick their children up. You see? My parents can't even drive

I can now testify, after almost 6 years here in KL, away from home...I missed home, I began to see the unique family I had, a mix heritage of baba & nyonya, began to appreciate the "specialness". I cant even began to explain how and's just beyond words. And all those 'scars' of my childhood slowly become what I see as 'chapters of memories' that made me to who I am today, a young lady who was trained in a tough way to survive and was picked up by that Amazing Grace.
Home / Family used to be such a stressful state to live in and now, I went home to de-stress! Honestly, I was going through so much stress for a few months before I decided that I needed to get away. How much twist and turns has swept me...who would have imagined? I definately wouldnt

My heart yearn to go home now...after almost 6 years, Im begging God to take me home. I believe only He can...waiting can be torturous at times, waiting for His perfect timing. No family is perfect but like in Lilo & Stich - Ohana means family and family means you will never be forgotten or left behind. I believe my family need me even more now, the wrinkled faces of my parents and the teenage stage my sister is going through. I want to be a there for make a diiference in a home I never really had so that my family can have a place called 'Home' now.

My grandma...please pray with me. I think her time may be go home to be with the Lord, where we all belonged.

p/s : Ally Macbeal of a Radio Station? Huh? Thanks jacksaid for that erhmmm i-dunno-what-to-say-title, whatever went through your mind when you decided to name the link to my blog as such?

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