Monday, December 19, 2005

My footprints - Chapter One

I have been having the idea of penning down my life story since young. So here are my attempts. Why do I write of my own story at the age of 25? To remind myself where I have been, what made me the way I once was and now am with much hope that my set of footprints will point towards the One who met me half way on my journey...

This is a story I am proud to share, not because its perfect. In fact, it is far from a nice story but because I believe, it is specially written for me and I share them with you....my deeper self
_____________________________________________________

Year : 1984
Place : Penang, datuk keramat

I was awaken by some commotion happening downstairs. I crept out from my mattress, which lies on the floor next to my parents' bed. I never had a room to call my own growing up in a house shared by a few relatives and my nyonya grandmother.

Slowly I made my way downstairs, taking quiet steps down the almost 45 degrees wooden staircase in a pre-war house situated at one of the busiest streets of Penang. The noise got louder and by now, it has become clear that there was a fight going on. I peeped through a small window directing me to the dining room / kitchen area. What I saw that night stayed in me til this very day.

My parents, my grandma and few of my relatives were present. They were trying to pull my dad and my uncle (dad's brother) away from one another. Both were shouting or perhaps, more of challenging and daring each other. The fight got louder and people around them were struggling to hold them back. They both pointed their fists and mocked by gestures. Out of a sudden, my dad got really heated up and in a quick second, he grabbed a knife nearby and threathen to stab my uncle. Everyone was taken aback and did all they could to hold him back, trying to remove the knife from his grip but dad was quite a strong man.

I held my breath and remembered how terrified I was being only at 4 years old. I didnt stay on to watch the rest of the story...I guess perhaps I was scared. I quickly sneak upstairs and into my parents' room. I don't remember what they were fighting about until things have to turn so sour, I couldn't understand but I knew that night, my dad was a scary man.

I fell asleep in my terrifying-ness and I don't think I spoke to anyone about the incident. No one knew what I saw

4 comments:

Mavik said...

Man that has got to leave a huge impact in your life...

@>-;-- jay said...

I know it must be a difficult time... But don't lose courage... Because life moves on and time heals all wounds. God Bless!~

The Hedonese said...

hey joanne, journalling is a good spiritual discipline... from tracing what God has already done in ur life, you can more or less sense the calling he has for you now and future :)

kiawin said...

What.. happened?